My Single Adjustment That Worked: The Way I Conquered After-Work Tension Through an Surprising Discovery in the Loft

I often feel like a coiled spring once the workday ends. Tension grips my shoulders, breathing becomes rapid and shallow. Usually, closing my laptop with a thud would be followed by the pop of a cork from a wine bottle, the wine hastily sploshed into a glass, that first mouthful putting a much-needed full stop on the working day.

Then, several months back, I discovered an old school recorder belonging to my grown son up in the loft. I idly blew into it, instantly reminded of the time it was the bane of my life – his daily rehearsals felt like an attack on my ears, the piercing shriek still reverberating through my head long after he slept.

But rather than consigning it to the bin, I brought it downstairs, along with a book – Very Easy Recorder Tunes. Growing up, I was the least musical child ever. I took recorder classes in primary school, yet never got to try other instruments.

Searching online for recorder tutorials, I viewed many kid-friendly YouTube clips, and got a fingering guide on paper. Looking up simple recorder songs, I felt excited when I played a recognizable Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. Yes, it was something your average five-year-old could master before first break, yet for a stressed, impatient, musically-challenged adult, it felt like a huge achievement.

My son questioned my actions (and begged me to quit), but I kept going – I liked the way the recorder made me feel. My inability to remember anything forced me to focus on the music sheet, and carefully mimic the finger placements. My breathing slowed down, I was focused, and once I’d mastered that first faltering tune, I was overjoyed. I could play an instrument.

Today, after some months, I can “play” other nursery rhymes and a passable Ode to Joy. Yes, my timing is rubbish, and I still need to write the names of the notes down, but to me, it’s not about skill or being a musician – it’s purely about the joy it provides and the fact I can’t think of anything else when I am playing.

I read that only one in six children learn to play the recorder now, which was no doubt music to parents’ ears, yet it made me wistful for my school years, as well as my son’s.

I make it a habit to play each night after work as my first activity, and during those 20 minutes, I escape into my own realm. And afterwards, I feel refreshed and happy.

My friends find it amusing, yet a therapist friend informed me that I was reducing stress, but improving my cognitive skills, such as memory and auditory processing, which is precious at my age. And in terms of my day-to-day wellbeing, it’s a real “ode to joy” indeed.